Ubuntu – Shifting sands – healing rifts

Today 24th June I gave blood. The act of donating a bit of you to help someone else has always struck a chord with me, and when I hear about those who have donated organs to others, I feel humbled and proud that so many people can demonstrate their shared humanity and inter dependence in such a personal manner. Of course we all make sacrifices at so many different levels, within the family, the work place, friends, neighbours and even people we don’t know at all. We appreciate that everything becomes inter connected particularly now as the world has become a smaller place. The Africans have a lovely word for it ‘Ubuntu’ recognising that in our shared humanity we are who we are because of us, and that we are all bound together in so many ways. Friends and enemies meet, listen to each other’s stories, understand each other more and maybe forgive each other. So Mandela not only struck up an unexpected relationship with his jailers, but once freed he gave them prominent seats at his presidential inauguration. I also remember the immensely moving sight of a South African judge who served under apartheid providing meals on wheels to elderly people who he had imprisoned in the apartheid years in that lovely documentary film ‘One day after peace’. If we are able to give of ourselves and as Mandela did recognise the power of both forgiveness on the one hand and genuine remorse on the other, we can all play our part in making something positive out of an otherwise dire situation.

Now where does that take us today – the day after the referendum. I have had friends ringing and emailing me using phrases like ‘it’s a total disaster’ and ‘I have let the younger generation down’; I have had French friends ask me simply ‘Why?’. Had it been the other way round no doubt there would have been similar comments the other way round. Life has to move on and politicians now have to heal the rifts left behind by a very angry and at times vicious debate. Amidst all the political and economic turmoil with political heads rolling, a crash in the value of sterling, and the prospect of a very uncertain future, there needs to be a small voice of calm, a period of quiet reflection and restoration. Talk of retribution and dire consequences, of UKIPs plea encouraging other European countries to join the exit, all this excites and exacerbates the hurt on either side. Respect for politicians and institutions has to be earned, and frankly of late that has been wanting on either side. In the campaign politicians like litigants in courts attempt to damage each other below the water line; in Europe they warned constantly of the awful consequences of the UK withdrawing.

There have been some encouraging signs from the Brexit camp with Boris Johnson urging moderation and reconciliation. Undoubtedly good grace and moderation by the winners will encourage the healing process with those that have lost. Choosing the right words sets the tone for conversations and meetings to come. Personally I would encourage all politicians to take time out informally and together to take what William Uri calls a walk from NO to YES. I would encourage anyone who hasn’t looked at his TED talk to do so – and I apologise for constantly mentioning it – https://www.ted.com/talks/william_ury?language=en . The healing process shouldn’t begin with the formalities of official meetings in the public gaze. Time to reconnect informally, it it’s allowed, and only once the relationships have got back onto an even keel should the very difficult areas for discussion be tabled. Giving formal notice under Article 50 of the European Convention should be delayed. Quiet deliberation encourages understanding – it’s just as much a problem for UK Plc as it is for Brussels. Maybe I am being over optimistic, but peace and reconciliation and maybe even apologies all round may follow. Giving blood is painful – but its worthwhile remembering that we are all in this world together like it of not. But I still think I shall need something stronger this evening than a cup of tea to get over my shock. Maybe its still too raw, or maybe taking the dogs for a walk will assist. At least they can tell the difference between a Biscuit from a Brexit.

24th June 2016